When are things supposed to be, what are things supposed to be. In law we were taught there is no right and there is no wrong. Things in black and white. But really, sometimes in real life, what is right is not necessarily fair and the same goes for what is wrong.
I just don't seem to get it. When I was growing up back in M'sia, my parents were so busy all the time, yeah they were there, but only when they needed to be. Suffice to say, they did just enough, just what was needed to be a parent. But emotionally, I never once confided in them, never once argued, or even bothered to, or tried to make sense of anything with them. I just did it on my own. Everything. Facing going to school knowing once again I would be the freak, the outcast, every single freaking day... where were they then? Most things in life, it was always, they don't need to know, they would just be better off not knowing. So alot of things, they remain hidden and secret. Important things to me, things that I wish I could tell them. But I don't want to. Like I said, they are better off not knowing.
Maybe I grew up too fast. Maybe they started caring too late. Maybe time just messed it all up... freaking time... damn it... grrrrrr.... but no such thing.. argh logic is messed up.....
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
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